hindi muhavare SMS

Dhobi Ka kutta na ghar ka na ghat ka.- Washerman’s doberman neither house nor bank river

Tumhare Kaan Baj Rahe He- Your eardrums are playing drums

English is a very Funny Lauguage Naa Pine hain na Apple. Phie bhi Pineapple

Aata Maajhi satakali- Now my head gear has gone to the sides

Bagal mai chhora aur shehar mai dhindhora- Boy under Armpit and Hypercity noise Pollution

Jab bade baat kar rahe ho to beech mai toka nahi karte- When elders get Cosy. Youngers dont put nosy

Saale ko kutte ki maut marunga- Brother-in-law will die Tommy’s Death

Tujhe paakar meri Chatti aur bhi Chaudi ho gayi hai- My Chest has become Blouse

Main Tumhe Chatti ka dooth yaad dila dunga- I will make you remember Milk No. 6

Crazy C.I.D Facts

1. Daya has the world record of breaking most number of doors.
2. C.I.D bureau has 1 toyota qualis since last 11 years.
3. In entire 20 storeyed building of C.I.D only 7 people works.
4. There is no POLICE, C.I.D handles every case.
5. Accused person accepts his crime only after getting slap from Daya on face.
6. None of them ever got married.
7. None of them ever got promotion, not even ACP.
8. Salunke just presses CONTROL & ALT, & gets Finger prints tested.
9. people remember a person they just saw once & give exact sketch.
10.End of episode, all criminals get Fassi.

6 Funny SMS's

Agar ho bimar to dhundo chemist,Agar ho bimar to dhundo chemist,My name is Khan & m not a terrorist.

Rat k 2 bje baji ghar ki bell,Rat k 2 bje baji ghar ki bell,Maine Gate Khola toh,Chowkidar bola.ALL IZZ WELLALL IZZ WELL

Karna padta hai apne kharcho pe kabu,Karna padta hai apne kharcho pe kabu,Ek chutki sindur ki kimat tum kya jano ramesh babu??

Tum bin hum yu kaise ji payege,Tum bin hum yu kaise ji payege,”Aayege! Mere Karan Arjun aayege”

Call karne se pehle balance jachna,Call karne se pehle balance jachna,Basanti in kutto k samne mat nachna

Mehbuba k pyar me mar gaya peter,Mehbuba k pyar me mar gaya peter,Hero Honda Splendor 80km/Litre.

Rajinikanth SMS Reloaded

 1.)Rajinikanth doesn’t wear a watch. He decides what time it is.
2.) Rajinikanth has already been to Mars, that’s why there are no signs of life there.
3.) Rajinikanth killed the dead sea.
4.) If you spell ‘Rajanikant’ wrong on Google it doesn’t say, “Did you mean Rajinikanth?” It simply             
     replies, “Run while you still have the chance.”
5.) Rajinikanth can play the violin with a piano
6.) Rajnikanth once wrote a cheque, the bank bounced!
7.) Micheal Jordan to Rajini: I can spin a ball on my finger for over two hours. Can you? 
     Rajni: Rascala; how do you think the earth spins!?
8.) When Rajinikanth gives you the finger, he’s telling you how many seconds you have left to live.
9.) Rajinikanth once ordered a plate of idli in McDonald’s, and got it.
10.) If Rajnikant was born 100 years earlier, British would have fought to get independence from India.
11.) When Rajnikant logs on to facebook.com, facebook updates its status message!
12.) Rajni once killed 20 men just by saying “BANG”
13.) Rajinikanth knows Victoria’s secret.
14.) Rajinikanth can divide by zero.
15.) Rajinikanth has counted to infinity, twice.

HINDI FILM SONGS & DIAGNOSIS OF WHAT’S REALLY WRONG WITH YOU

(No Need to VISIT Doctor TO FIND OUT)
==============================
Jiya Jale jaan jale, Raat bhar dhuan chale : FEVER
Tadap tadap ke is dil se aah nikalti rahi : HEART ATTACK
Juda hoke bhi tu mujhme kahin baaki hai: CONSTIPATION
Bidi jalaile jigar se piya jigar ma badi aag hai: ACIDITY
Tujhme rab dikhta hai yaara main kya karoon : CATARACT
Tujhe yaad na meri aayi kisi se ab kya kehna : ALZEIMERS
Mann dole mera tann dole : VERTIGO
Dil Dhadak Dhadak ke keh raha hai : HIGH BP
Aaj Kal Paaon Zameen per nahin padte mere : CORN ON FEET
Hai re hai …. Neend nahin aaye : INSOMNIA

STUDENT WHO OBTAINED 0% ON AN EXAM

STUDENT WHO OBTAINED 0% ON AN EXAM.
1. In which battle did Napoleon die?
* his last battle

Q2. Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?
* at the bottom of the page

Q3. River Ravi flows in which state?
* liquid

Q4. What is the main reason for divorce?
* marriage

Q5. What is the main reason for failure?
* exams

Q6. What can you never eat for breakfast?
* Lunch & dinner

Q7. What looks like half an apple?
* The other half

Q8. If you throw a red stone into the blue sea what it will become?
* It will simply become wet

Q9. How can a man go eight days without sleeping ?
* No problem, he sleeps at night.

Q10. How can you lift an elephant with one hand?
* You will never find an elephant that has only one hand.

Q11. If you had three apples and four oranges in one hand and four apples and three oranges in other hand, what would you have ?
* Very large hands

Q12. If it took eight men ten hours to build a wall, how long would it take four men to build it?
* No time at all, the wall is already built.

Q13. How can u drop a raw egg onto a concrete floor without cracking it?
*Any way you want, concrete floors are very hard to crack.

Meri Maut - Kavita

Tha mai neend mein aur
mujha itna sajaya ja raha tha,
bade hi pyar se mujhe nehlaya ja raha tha,
najane tha wo kaun sa ajab khel mere ghar mai,
bacchon ki taraha mujha kandhe pe uthaya ja raha tha,
tha paas mere mera har apna us waqt,
phir bhi main har kisi muh sai bulaya ja raha tha,
jo kabi dekhte bhi na tha,mahabbat ki nigha se,
un ke dil se pyar mujh par lutaya ja raha tha,
malum nahi hairan tha har koi,
mujhe sota dekh kar,
fir zor zor sa ro kar mujhe hansaya ja raha tha,
kap uthi meri rooh, mera wo makan dekh kar,
pata chala mujhe dafnaya ja raha tha,
ro pada fir mai bhi apna wo manzar dakh kar,
jaha mujhe hamesha ke liya sulaya ja raha tha................